Dakarai Molokomme, a 15-year-old starving child from a small village in Zimbabwe, has just told Madonna, one of the most famous pop stars in the world, to go and f*** herself, the local media are reporting exclusively.
“Yes, it’s true, I told Madonna to go f*** herself. Do you want to know why?” Dakarai asked. “It’s the same thing every time with these snobby rich Americans. Every once in a while they come to show us their support for the so-called eradication of poverty by adopting a child from a starving family, but they actually do more harm than good. Transracial international adoptions are part of the white savior industrial complex,” Dakarai explained.
In further discussions with journalists from the media, the kid stated that “none of the children here actually want to be taken away from their family and friends so they can be displayed as some kind of trophy in the homes of self-righteous singers or actors who want to score some points with the media and Oprah.”
“If they really want to help us, they should get Big Pharma to ship us some anti-retroviral drugs for the AIDS epidemic, or build schools and hospitals. If they don’t want to do that, then they can all go f** themselves!” the child told reporters.
The 15-year-old also stated that he would say the same thing to any one of those American or European “faux humanitarian posers”, except for Bono, whom he said he would also kick in the groin.
“Bono’s efforts to save the African savage from itself prove that the colonial imperative is alive and well,” Dakarai said as he walked with other village children collecting sticks to build a tree fort.
THIS IS THE RAWEST 15 YEAR OLD ALIVE
boom america slam
July 10th 1925: Scopes Monkey Trial begins
On this day in 1925 the trial of John Scopes, who stood accused of teaching evolution and thus violating Tennessee’s Butler Act, began. The trial drew the attention of the nation, as to many it seemed as if Charles Darwin’s theory of evolution itself was on trial, especially its compatibility with religion (namely Christian Creationism). The most famous lawyers of the day argued the case, with former Democratic nominee for President William Jennings Bryan prosecuting and Clarence Darrow defending. Scopes was ultimately found guilty of teaching evolution, but was let free on a technicality. The trial was one of the most dramatic and famous in history and has since become synonymous with religious backlash against scientific progress.
Wait, wait, wait, I have an amazing new idea. How about we fix the American school system.
The all-time U.S. leading goal scorer is Abby Wambach, with 167 goals, followed by Mia Hamm (158), Kristine Lilly (130), Michelle Akers (105) and Tiffeny Milbrett (100). In fact, Abby Wambach is the all-time leading goal scorer in the world, among all soccer players, male or female.
Jon nails it again.
The only thing I can think of that’s scarier than living in a culture where the looming threat of gun violence is this consistent is being a culture where gun violence is met with this sort of blase apathy.
This little rant described the way I look at religion perfectly.
Welcome to Alabama, the state of the never-ending seat belt ticket.
Hali Wood is 17. She’s applied to work at several grocery stores in her home town of Columbiana, but none are hiring. A few months back, cops ticketed Hali for not wearing a seat belt. The fine: $41. Hali has paid $41 and then some, but she’s still hundreds of dollars in debt. Why? Because the court contracts with JCS, a for-profit probation company that forces Hali to choose between paying their exorbitant fees or going to jail.
Here’s how the scheme works:
Borrowing from the payday lender playbook, companies like JCS often sign contracts in cities and counties strapped for cash. For the county, the deal seems like a sweet one: The company will collect outstanding court debts for free and make all their profits from charging probationers fees. But the problem is that many of these people were put on probation because they were too poor to pay their fine in the first place and for them, the additional fees are huge. People find themselves scrambling for money they don’t have and forgoing basic necessities to avoid being thrown behind bars for missing a payment. The impact on communities, especially low-income communities of color, is devastating.
Conservatives are keen on privatizing functions of government. What they don’t tell you is that they only want to privatize the profitable ones, and let the private sector pocket the revenue from them.
A man drinking canned iced tea in a parking lot was accosted by a plainclothes beverage cop who demanded to inspect his drink. He was placed in handcuffs and arrested. Even though the man was innocent and was only drinking tea, prosecutors are still trying to set him up with probation and community service.
One man, Christopher Lamont Beatty, was holding a canned beverage, while his friend, Tino Brown, was recording video using his cell phone. That’s when the two were interrupted by a man who was interested in the man’s choice of refreshments.
A man in plainclothes, claiming to be “the police”, insisted that he turn over his beverage for an inspection. Beatty refused the stranger’s requests, but pointed out that it was only an AriZona-brand drink, “Half-and-Half” iced tea and pink lemonade — not alcohol.
Brown and Beatty pointed out that they didn’t know the identity of the nosy man and that Beatty had committed no crime. Still, the man demanded to examine his beverage and would not take no for an answer.
The stranger then claimed that Mr. Beatty was under arrest. He became grabby and ended up putting Beatty in a choke-hold as he took him down to the ground.
The bully, who turned out to be Alcohol & Beverage Control Law Enforcer Rick Libero, forced Mr. Beatty face-down onto the concrete and placed him in handcuffs.
The government requests that Beatty “submit to a year of probation, do 24 hours of community service, have a mental health assessment, and submit to drug testing and warrantless searches,” reported the Fayetteville Observer.
“It would get it dismissed at the end, but I would still have to take responsibility for my actions, and I felt like I did nothing wrong,” Beatty said
Black in AmeriKKKa.
cops are emotional pricks that cover it up with masculinity.
Jesus fucking Christ.